Canon Cagematch: VILLAINS

💀 The ESA executive team hopes everyone had a satisfactorily spine-tingling Halloween and thanks all the brave souls that made it to our HOWLween event! Fear not, however; there is one last treat in store before we must bid farewell to the spirit of Halloween. Gather around the cauldron as the ESA executive team put forth their most loathed villains (no, professors and essay deadlines do not count). 💀 

Jia, President: For the collective “Monster Mash” blog post last year, I wrote about Victor Frankenstein. I was grappling with the task of finding out which villain I wanted to write with when it occurred to me that Frankenstein is still the dude for me. It’s been a year, and I’m still not over the villainy of the privilege of an educated white dude, father abandonment, and scientific hubris. He is the monster, and the villain, of Shelley’s Frankenstein, no doubt.

Rebecca, Vice President, Editor-in-Chief TGS: When it comes to villains, Scar has it all. Elaborate schemes? Yes. Cool edgy name that’s just an intimidating noun? Check. Equally cool and equally edgy facial scar? I mean, obviously. Beautiful hair? Absolutely. What did Mufasa ever do for anyone, anyway? Maintained some hyena vs. every single other animal segregation on the Pride Lands, banishing them to a place light doesn’t even touch just because they’re scavengers? That doesn’t sound very kumbaya-everyone-has-a-place-in-the-circle-of-life to me. Is Scar really so bad just because he doesn’t believe in the divine right of kings? Whatever. Monarchy is as monarchy does. Let the contender with the best musical number succeed.

Kristina, Treasurer: I went into Wuthering Heights knowing nothing absolutely nothing about the plot besides the fact it’s one of literature’s great love stories – I cannot live without my life! I cannot live without my soul! – and came out with the realization I’d be perfectly happy if Heathcliff wandered around a moor lifeless, soulless and Cathy-less for the rest of eternity. Dude has it coming.

Sarah, Secretary: Jadis, the White Witch of Narnia, is one of the most hard-core villains out there. She casually sports Azlan’s mane. She prevents Christmas from coming and I mean, who needs that consumer driven holiday anyways? She has the ability to turn people into stone, and she actually uses the fossilized remains of her enemies to decorate the halls of her castle. What is more wicked than living with your petrified enemies?

Alex, Blog Manager: The word ‘villain’ is almost embarrassingly black and white, and Adrian Veit (Ozymandias) of Watchmen makes the label even more laughable. Anyone can murder millions of innocents, as Veit plans with the unsuspecting population of New York City. However, it takes a particular character to make the reader pause in their condemnation of such destruction. Veit believes he did “the right thing” because the death of millions ensures the protection of billions. The fact that it proves difficult for many of us to argue against Veit’s logic speaks volumes about The Smartest Man in the World. What other ‘villain’ can compel us to accept such an apocalyptic means to an end, as well as twist our definitions of savior and murderer?

💀 Canon Cagematch is a planned series for the ESA blog where students can butt heads over which fictional character is best suited for the round’s chosen theme. Have an idea or interested in participating? Email blog@ubcenglish.com and defend your favourites! 💀